If someone you care about is being abused, it could be crucial that you support them. But just how do you help someone who is being abused? Many of us who are put in this situation can quickly realise that helping an abuse victim isn’t straightforward. The wrong move could cause them to withdraw or could cause the abuse to escalate. By treading carefully, you can help them to get out of the abusive situation and recover. Here are just a few steps to take.
Know the signs of abuse
Abuse can take many forms – including physical, sexual, emotional and financial abuse. Some people are able to put on a brave face and conceal what is going on. This can sometimes make it hard to detect if someone is being abused, but there are often small signs to look out for. Behavioural changes are the biggest indicator of potential abuse. If someone seems agitated, withdrawn, unusually apologetic or down, there could be something going on. You may not always know who the abuser is, however you can usually tell by how they react to a certain person’s name. That said, you should avoid prying too much – it is better to encourage them to open up by simply emphasising that you are there for them if they have any issues.
Listen without judgement
If someone who is being abused does open up to you, it is important that you keep them talking by listening. Avoid passing any judgement – both towards them or the abuser. Instead, simply validate any feelings they have. Of course, if they try to justify the abuse, remind them that any abuse is not acceptable. Avoid discussing solutions until they have fully opened up to you. You want to gain their trust so that they willingly ask for your help.
Try to be available
Some abuse victims may not want to open up completely at first. However, there may be a time later when they feel more comfortable talking to you. Try to be as available as you can and emphasise the fact that you are there for them. Of course, this has to be within reason.
Know when to suggest an escape plan
Someone who is experiencing ongoing abuse may need to be persuaded to consider an escape plan – especially if things have been getting physical. Helping them form an escape plan could give them some hope and help them to come around to the idea of no longer putting up with the abuse. However, you need to be careful of pushing them into it.
Know when to call the police
If you suspect that they may be in real danger, don’t be afraid to intervene by calling the police. This typically includes situations where violence is ongoing or serious threats have been made. You should definitely call the police if children are involved. While the victim may not always appreciate you intervening, it could be the only way to remove the danger and keep them safe.
Help them seek support
Abuse victims who have fully opened up should be encouraged to seek professional support. If they do not want to press criminal charges, there may still be the option of a lawsuit. By helping them find a specialist lawyer such as this Mary Davis detention center abuse lawyer, they can build a strong case and get the compensation they deserve. Helping them seek out professional counselling or support groups could also be beneficial. This could help them to mentally recover from the abuse.
Look after yourself too
Helping someone who is being abused could take its toll on your health too. If you feel stressed and drained by everything going on, don’t be afraid to get some counselling yourself. Make sure that you don’t put yourself in too much danger – if an abuser makes threats against you or attacks you, make sure to call the police. Don’t be bullied into silence.
