A Man’s Fear Of Dating

fear of dating

Lu asked me if I would write a guest post about the perspective of a man dating. This should be interesting, what with me being a country boy and all that, but I can only try. Dating is something that instills fear in many a man. It can be something very scary indeed.  Us men can be really confused by women.



What is it that makes a man fear more things than life itself?  What is it that can make a full-grown man break out in a cold sweat and why? Why do us men fear the unknown? Why do some men, in general, feel so uncomfortable? Yes, I am talking about dating!

If you use social media, watch tv or even go old school and read the newspaper, you will see adverts for dating sites, for example, County Durham datingCounty Tyrone datingDyfed dating or for the older generation over 50’s Tayside . Some of us blokes are terrible for adverts! We click on it, look around, we find something we like and then that’s as far as we venture. I think as a whole women are far more forward than men socially.

I have terrible social anxiety, it has held me back in so many ways and probably cost me opportunities over the years too. Women, on the other hand, are so much more outgoing, so much more willing and prepared to put themselves out there. I have had a few friends use the dating apps on the smartphone and believe me, it’s oh she is nice, oh she isn’t that young, I know! That’s been around… Honestly, we are so driven by our trousers, so driven by looks. Oh dear, we are a dodgy lot, aren’t we?

Out Of The Pond

I was very fortunate in meeting Lu, many years ago. We were both attending a local fishing club competition. Her first impression of me was an arrogant p*rick. To this day, her opinion hasn’t changed! Again, this is a part of my social issues, I do come across as a bit of a twit at times.  Lu and I bumped into each other socially during the years and we eventually became friends. Our relationship developed from there. We’ve been together for eight years now, so I’ve been out of the dating pond for a long time.

Friends On The Lookout

A few of our friends, as I said, have used dating apps and if they had a message come through it was almost as if the phone was going to bite them if they looked at the message! If it was one of our female friends it would be such a different scenario, all giggles and can’t wait to see what it said.  One of our friends used to just hand the phone over to Lu to do that chatting part for him.  She does not find chatting difficult. Getting her to stop chatting, now that’s much more difficult.



Man Secrets

So here it is in a nutshell. I believe men are far more reluctant to commit to dating sites, I think many of us are shy. Honestly, we may have tough exteriors but underneath the stubble and cracked hands, we are softies, afraid of getting rejected or hurt.  Guys, don’t let that stop you! Take the bull by the horns as to speak. I know dating can be a minefield, I know it’s scary, but really, what can happen? You might meet the woman of your dreams, you might meet the best friend you will ever have or you might just meet a great companion. Either way, take that leap of faith.

My Advice Is This:

  • guys don’t be afraid to try it. embrace it and actually enjoy the experience. Women don’t bite.. well most of them don’t.
  • gals,  Please go easy on us guys, we are but mere boys inside and do fear rejection, humiliation and most of all loneliness

Thanks for reading.  You can head over to CZ Owners to read more of my ramblings.


Wagne B

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